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Talking to Depression Simple Ways To Connect When

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When someone suffers from depression, friends and family members naturally want to help-but too often their good intentions come out all wrong. This practical, compassionate guide helps readers understand exactly what their loved one is going through, and why certain approaches help and others have the potential to do damage. Talking to Depression offers specific advice on what to do and what not to do-and what to say and what not to say-to avoid frustration and give the kind of caring, effective support that will make a difference. more info

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8 Comments

Summaries of what is already said.
Rating:2 out of 5 stars
This book seems to summarise what is already known, and fits Bipolar into the medical model rather than the wholistic health model. You can get most of this information from the information sheets published by the drug companies and the DSM IV. I myself am a mental health RN, my partner a naturopath, so I am not ignorant on either viewpoint. This is not a book I suggest family members read as their first choice when it comes to depression. Taking tablets is not the only choice, nor does it mean things are improved as research has clearly shown. Cognitive therapies which this book promotes as something that benefits in conjunction with medication, can be better as a stand alone especially with regard to anti anxiolitics which impair therapy, Something this book does not grasp. The author is a specialist in learning disorders and altzymers, which is radically different from depression. As a professional myself, I can see clearly where this author has gone wrong. If you still buy this book, keep in mind it is only one point of view, and a narrow one at that.


Great book for friends and family
Rating:5 out of 5 stars
When I got diagnosed my family immediately began researching depression and learning all they could. I just discovered this book at my parents’ house, full of yellow highlighted passages. It was so touching to learn that they care that much about me and that they know me so well.

I found the book to be so very truthful on many levels. She describes many possible actions and reactions and thoughts and feelings of the depressed person. While not all of them related directly to me, I could see that my family had found the ones that did and really took them to heart. So, the list must be very exhaustive and you will surely find your loved one there, even if all the symptoms don’t match.

My family has responded in such a wonderful manner to me and seem to have given me exactly what I needed when I needed it. Underneath the depression I had marveled at how “good” they were at supporting me. Now I can see where they got the specific advice as to what to do and what to say and what not to say - right here in this book and it was SPOT ON. Thinking back, I can almost pinpoint when they read this because I distinctly remember when they stopped saying the “Things you should never say to a depressed person.” I remember being thankful that they had finally stopped the useless advice(!)

It’s a short book, an easy read but don’t discount its helpfulness and usefulness.

I recommend this book highly. For you - if you’re depressed - find yourself on the lists and show your family what will help and what won’t; for you - if you have a depressed loved one. I have even recommended it to my counselor to recommend to the families of her other depressed clients.


TALKING TO DEPRESSION: A Simple Guide For The Layperson
Rating:5 out of 5 stars
I highly recommend this compassionate handbook which gives simple, practical suggestions about how to help a person who is struggling with depression. TALKING TO DEPRESSION is not for therapists but rather for the rest of us–family members and friends who are in the trenches with a depressed person “in all the moments of every day.” The book begins with a brief overview of depression written in plain language and goes on to provide a glimpse of what depression feels like from the inside as described by people who have actually experienced it. What I found most helpful was the author’s specific advice about what to say and what not to say, about what to do and what not to do when trying to give comfort and support to someone suffering with depression. And the book closes with an excellent list of resources for further study and assistance. With TALKING TO DEPRESSION, Claudia Strauss has given us a gift–she reminds us that everyday people in everyday situations can make a difference, and she teaches us how.


an absolute must for anyone with depression or who has a loved one with depression
Rating:5 out of 5 stars
As a former mental health therapist and a person diabled by depression, I highly recommend this book. I wish I had had it 7 years ago when my mother moved in with me. She was saying all the “don’ts” and not doing any of the “dos”. I got this book recently and read through it, marvelling at how my mother has, over the years, learned how to help me with my depression.

Another plus for this book is that it is written on a human level, not using a lot of dry facts or professional terminology, but just saying what needs to be said. It even includes a section on how children and teenagers can learn what to say and do as well as a section on what to say and do if a parent notices symptoms of depression in their child or adolescent.


I was curious…
Rating:5 out of 5 stars
I read this because I was mesmerized by the concept that this kind of support exists…these kinds of people thinking these kinds of thoughts. It’s utterly alien to me. My family talking to me about depression, is equivalent to a conversation between Ann Coulter and Barney Frank, if it’s allowed for discussion at all.

Freinds? They’re all the “bite your lip” tuffies. They say, “Oh, I have depression, too.” I guess they are tougher than me, if they work full-time, and go to school, and raise small children, and maintain a full social calendar. That to me is a peculiar brand of depressed person. It reminds me of hearing about NFL players, playing while suffering from the flu. Sorry…doesn’t happen; not with the actual flu. Under the fullest weight, something has to give.

These days “feeling blue” is popularly believed to be the same as Major Depression, and anything more virulent than the sniffles, is described as “the flu”.

I’ve had those discussions. I’ve been through the HMO mill, after having been diagnosed with Major Depression several years ago. And I had to read this book as a sort of counterbalance. Call it an indulgence in fantasy.

I have the highest regard for those of you who are considering reading this book in an effort to understand someone close to you. It’s a fine book. More power to you.


good book; “light”; easy read
Rating:4 out of 5 stars
As someone who has suffered from depression for years, I found the book to be fairly accurate. It doesn’t provide a lot of detail, but it gives enough information that non-sufferers can gain a little better understanding of the illness and how to deal with those suffering from it. At 200 pages it’s a very easy read (I read it in two sittings). Not a bad book to get a quick overview on depression and some ideas on how you can help (and what *not* to do) when someone you care about is suffering.


Talking to Depression Review
Rating:4 out of 5 stars
First and foremost, Talking to Depression by Claudia Strauss is a map. It’s a map for travelers in a tricky and sometimes dangerous land. If you have a family member, friend, or co-worker who suffers from depression, then this guidebook will serve as your navigator through troubled waters. While it offers an overview of depression in general, and a list of resources to contact at its close, its greatest strength lies in the concrete, down-to-earth tips it has to offer to individuals who are trying to help a depressed person. From conversation starters to non-verbal shows of support to “gifting,” no avenue is left unexplored for the person desperately trying to cope with a depressed person on an every day basis.
Philosophically the author believes in a community approach to depression, not just in terms of teamwork on the part of the professionals who may be treating the depressed person, but also in terms of family and friends who have daily contact with the afflicted individual. Additionally, if depressed persons are made to feel part of that community of helpers, then they may be more likely to reach out to others and thus contribute to their own recovery.
Certainly, Talking to Depression can be read from cover to cover, but it’s organized and indexed in such a way as to facilitate easy access to certain sections of interest to the reader. For example, there’s a “Do Say/Don’t Say” Cheat Sheet, a chapter on suicide, and a section on childhood depression, just to name a few. Ms. Strauss has gathered together quotations from a variety of sources, which she skillfully uses as epigraphs for each chapter. These quotations not only enlighten the reader, but also bring in the wealth of human experience to bear on the subject at hand. My favorite one that she employs is from Aristotle - “A friend is a second self.” It says to me that if, as a depressed person, you can see a friend as a kind of mirror, then it’s possible to see in your well friend a “possible you.” In other words, there is hope.
The most poignant and moving section of this book, however, comes in Chapter Three which is entitled, “Seeing Through Their Eyes: What Depression Feels Like.” Included in this chapter are quotes from actual sufferers who describe with fresh language and concrete metaphors the nightmare that is depression, thus allowing the reader a privileged glimpse into their world.
As someone who has suffered from depression herself, I found the book accessible and lovingly wrought. While some coping strategies and philosophical outlooks that I found helpful are not included in the book, this only highlights the point that each person’s experience of depression, while universal in some features, is ultimately unique. Mary Arguelles


I am lucky to find this book to read
Rating:5 out of 5 stars
excellent book ! well-structed, easy to read, practical manual that you can follow in the daily life. I just finished it and I really think i am lucky to find this book to read. It is the right one to help me to cope with the daily challenge,as i have been struggling in the support for the one i loved in depression, sometimes confused and sometimes frustrated. I hope more peopel in this need could read it coz it’s really useful.


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